I don't know what I want to do with my life.

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fredraw
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by fredraw »

There isn't a magic solution that will make things better right away. You've made a smart choice to post here though, each small step is a progression. There are plenty of people here that will understand your situation. Keep posting and let us be company and a sounding board.
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Inrecovery
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Inrecovery »

Thanks. That's true. It's just always awkward when family or other people ask me what I've been doing with myself, some seem to assume that I should be working. To them I just sound lazy. But also I just feel like I've got no routine or purpose.
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Spork.
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Spork. »

Would they be understanding if you explained the situation?
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Inrecovery
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Inrecovery »

I don't think so.
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Muir
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Muir »

Not sure if you've seen this blog post https://thegoodlimbo.com/2018/12/02/how ... our-plate/ but I think it does a great job explaining how ability to cope and what we can manage varies from person to person. And not everyone will understand that, but it doesn't matter. It really doesn't matter what anyone else thinks. Focus on doing the best that you can for yourself. If that's going to get a degree, that's okay. If it's just getting out of bed in the morning, that's also okay. The only important think is that you do your best, and that you do it for yourself and not anyone else.
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Inrecovery
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Inrecovery »

Thanks for sharing that, it's very relatable. I wish I didn't care so much but I do.
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Muir
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Muir »

I think as you get older you learn to care a little less. I think most people, no matter the age, will tell you they still don't know what they want to do with their lives. So why let them tell you what you should be doing with yours?
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Maggie
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Maggie »

I think there’s too much pressure on people to have an idea of exactly what they want to do with life.. I hadn’t got a clue what I wanted to do and I sort of fell into what I do now after being persuaded by others to apply for the uni course when I was 23. It looks on the surface like I have it all together with the things people think should make someone’s life be sorted, a job, mortgage etc etc. But honestly; I haven’t got a clueeeee what I want to do with my life.
I don’t know my hobbies or interests outside of work and I dont really do anything much worth while with my time! I do have a list of countries I’d like to visit though if I get the money and time to travel and I know that I enjoy chatting to people and love animals so eventually combining those two things could be an option. Other than that.... nope! Clean slate.

What might be helpful is to write an ideal list of things you would like to do, not necessarily for any purpose other than because you quite fancy trying it out... like I don’t know, archery or falconry or skiing or horse riding or eating particular foods or whatever it is for you. Use that as your baseline of things you’d like to do within your life time and then if any of them feel like something you could explore a bit further than just trying it out then eventually you can look into that. For now... don’t compare your insides to other people’s outsides, people love to make themselves feel better by asking those stupid awkward questions and are great at only showing the world what they want people to see. Personally I think it’s their way of finding out if other people maybe don’t know what they’re doing either because they’re too afraid to admit it themselves.


Sorry. Monster reply.
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The flower that blooms in adversity is the most rare and beautiful of all.
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fredraw
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by fredraw »

Muir wrote:
Fri Dec 21, 2018 1:51 am
I think as you get older you learn to care a little less. I think most people, no matter the age, will tell you they still don't know what they want to do with their lives. So why let them tell you what you should be doing with yours?
I like this. As one here of more advancing years, I would say as you get older, it's not that you care less per se. I think the best way to describe it for me at least, is that you sift through and begin to change your perspective on what is important. I still get it wrong more often than I'd like, there's no avoiding that completely, but it is ever developing.
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Inrecovery
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Re: I don't know what I want to do with my life.

Post by Inrecovery »

Thanks for all your replies. That's a really good idea about writing a list. I'm very boring though tbh and all I can really think of putting on the list is maybe reading more books and maybe going on holidays! I don't really have any hobbies which makes life pretty boring and pointless, since I had a bad horse riding accident last year. I keep thinking about the Open University and thought about studying English but I'm not sure if I'd find it interesting enough and I'm worried I'd miss out on the social aspect of things, although I don't think I'd cope with the anxiety etc. of going back to college/uni and attempting to make friends again. I'm so lonely though. I guess I also worry about people thinking I'm lazy if I admit that I don't work.
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